DEARLY BELOVED......

         I truly grieve the loss of our union.  While the physical aspects of our relationship had deteriorated to nothingness, the things and life that we had created together were worth preserving despite that devastating loss.  I fear that our creations are lessened by our split, and especially in so far as you deny the importance of my contributions to the creation, may not survive.

        I have faith that you could fight the good fight and avoid becoming like Shirley, but so long as you live in denial of the profoundness of her condition, there is little hope that you can or will see the need to do whatever it takes to avoid or at least slow your own progression down that path.  That will take your recognizing that pointing the finger outwardly, regardless of how well that has worked for you in the past, will now only deepen the denial and speed the onset of your loss.  You need to allow someone else to take the reins and lead you in a direction that, though you cannot see it, may allow for your stabilization, if not improvement.  I would have wanted that person to be me.  But you were unwilling, perhaps unable, to give up that control to me.  It was and is easier for you to blame me and point at my admittedly manifold problems than to give any credence to your own. Perhaps you can allow LuAnn the reins, but your failing to heed her advice that this brain injury et al would be very hard on me as well as you, does not bode well for your listening to her guidance either. 

       I send you my best wishes.  I truly want nothing for you but a positive, viable future.  I do not want to fight you, but neither am I willing to just lie down and be a doormat to your mistaken cognitions and false accusations.  Since you insist that my future be lived without you, I am relieved of my burden to try to prevent your slide into oblivion, but I need my fair share of our creations to be able to carry on by myself.  I am sorry that you feel that I am robbing you of your retirement.  It was never my intention to do so, but the sad fact remains that until this split, we were each the largest part of each other’s life and work.  Given the advance knowledge that my reaction to your throwing me out once again would have worked out so poorly, I might not have been so combative, but since from my perspective there is no break in your shield of denial even a year later, and despite others witnessing an ever steepening slide, it was bound to come to this point regardless.  

Love,

ken

Read at your own (and my) risk

And you thought that the fascist conspiracy was focused in Washington DC. Nope, it has already infested the entire country where it is called the domestic violence and/or abuse system. A person files a bogus request for protection in order to gain an advantage in divorce proceedings, and to be safe rather than sorry, the court orders a restraining order. In my case, even though her attorney only requested 6 months, and admitted that there was no violence involved, the "hearing officer" ordered a five year restraining order. Presumably if I had actually hit her or something, I would have gotten life. But that's only the beginning. Please do not read the following post, as doing so makes you a participant in her current attempt to put me in jail. She is trying to make it a crime for me to post a copy of her court filing. And the court system is so ridiculous that there is some possibility that this could happen. Talk about revoking civil rights in the name of security. It's not over there folks, it's right here.
Meanwhile, the sad thing is that there are people at risk of domestic violence and this gross misuse of protective orders dilutes the system and thus puts those at risk in even more danger.

Now that it's to her advantage to be mentally off, she admits it.